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SCREEN TEST (Part I)

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“Come on in darlin’ and have a seat,” Leo Coffman said smoothly, “now, what can I do for ya!?!” “Well, Mr. Coffman, I saw your ad in the paper, and I was just wondering if the position was still available?!?” “You mean the ad in the Underground Times,” he asked casually!?! “Uh, yes,” she replied softly, “is the job still available?!?” “Baby, the job’s always available,” he replied dryly, “I run that same ad everyday of the year!!!” “Really,” she replied incredulously, “you mean that you just give away jobs that pay three hundred dollars a day!?!” “Honey, this is Hollywood,” he said gently, “ain’t nobody gives nobody nothin’, you earn every penny, and don’t you ever forget it!!!” “Then how,” she mumbled, “I guess I don’t understand!” “Listen, kid,” he asked, “where’re ya from!?!” “Iowa,” she replied quickly!!! “And how old are ya,” he questioned her!?! “I just turned eighteen two months ago,” she replied proudly, “why, does it matter!?!” “Oh, yeah, baby,” he replied softly, “you bet your sweet little corn fed ass it matters, now why don’t you do yourself a big favor and go get on a bus and go home, this ain’t no place for a sweet kid like you!!!”

“But your ad said females eighteen and above to make $300 per day and up,” she whined, “and since I’m eighteen……..” “Now look, baby,” he said evenly, “do you have any idea what we do here, I mean do ya know what you’d hafta do to earn those three C’s a day!?!” “I-it’s not illegal is it,” she asked warily, “I promised my mom I’d never break the law!?!” “No, it’s not illegal,” he shot back quickly, “but believe me, this isn’t the place for you, now scram outta here, okay!?!” There were a lot of things that Rachel McAndrews wasn’t, but unfortunately being stubborn was one them, so she crossed her arms and with a little gumption that even surprised Leo Coffman, she demanded, “Now Mr. Coffman, I don’t think that it’s fair that you won’t even consider me for this job, after all I’m a high school graduate and believe me, I really need this job!!!” Leo Coffman leaned back in his chair with his hands inner laced behind his head and said, “What’s your name darlin’!?!” “Rachel, Rachel McAndrews,” she responded!!! “Well, Rachel McAndrews, stand up and take off all of your clothes and let me check out your body!!!”

“W-what are you talking about,” Rachel stammered, “how dare you ask me to do such a thing!!!” “Let me ask you something,” Leo said, “just what in the fuck did you think you’d hafta do to earn 300 clams a day, do some typing and a little filing!?!” “We make porno movies here, baby,” he continued on, “that ad is designed to get young women barely out of high school to come in here to get fucked and sucked by some Neanderthal with a cock the size of the state of Idaho, now I tried to be nice and shoo your cute little butt outta here but you wouldn’t go, so if ya don’t mind, take off your fucking clothes or get outta my office, I’m a busy man!!!” Rachel sat there stunned at the tirade that Leo Coffman had given her, but when she thought about it for a second, she realized how dumb she had been to think that it would be a snap to earn that much money without having to give something very valuable in return, so after taking a deep breath, she stood up and began removing her clothing!!! Leo Coffman looked on with detached bemusement while the young woman from the mid west stripped in front of probably her first real live male, but when she was finally nude, he let out a low whistle and said softly, “Very nice, very nice indeed!!!” “So,” she asked nervously, “do I get that job!?!” 

This story continues in “SCREEN TEST (Part II)”

Click here to see the finished result of the audition!


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